March 26, 2019

Let's Talk About Panic Attacks

I'm sitting home, alone, right now and I've just had a panic attack that lasted roughly five minutes. I'm currently coming down from it and my feelings are very raw and real..... I'll decide later if this post will make the cut.

Panic attacks. All I can do is shake my head because I literally can't think right now. If you've never experienced one before- consider yourself lucky. Honestly, I don't have attacks all that often. I usually see them coming- if I've been super, super stressed over something or feeling overly anxious for a while. But not this time.

I have a night to myself. My baby is gone with my mother for the night, Craig gone with friends. I was looking forward to this quiet, leisurely night alone.

I did what I wanted- blogged, a quick workout, watched a couple movies on Netflix. Just lounged on the couch.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, I started to cry. And then I cried harder...and harder...and harder. Until I couldn't breathe anymore.

Feeling lightheaded, taking in short gasps of air. The back of my neck and shoulders suddenly so tense it ached. Holding my stomach feeling like my ribs could crack at any moment by my deep sobs. My entire body started to sweat. I could feel it through my pajama pants.

Short quick breaths. Over and over and over again. Scared to death that I might pass out while being here alone.

It lasted about five minutes I'm guessing. You could have told me it lasted five hours and I would have believed you because that's what it feels like in the moment.

I feel myself coming down- trying to get my breathing back under control. Little waves of lightheadedness pass over me. I get up to walk to make sure I'm steady. I feel like I can peel the clothes from my body. I call Craig- needing to hear a reassuring voice.

I'm okay now. Mentally and physically I feel like I've just been drug through a war. My mind and body are exhausted. But I'm okay.

Now that I can better gather my thoughts about this I want to understand what may have triggered my panic attack. IS it due to stress? IS it because I'm missing my little girl and want her home with me even though I do need a little "me time" break every now and then? IS it because I've triggered my health anxiety while watching a movie where someone mentioned the C word? IS it because I've recently started intermittent fasting and my body is trying to adjust to the change? Is it everything combined? Or not of it at all?

I wish I knew.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It's the next morning (had a terrible time sleeping last night) and I'm sat here deciding if I should continue with this post or just scrap it.

See, the thing about panic attacks -at least for me- is that I end up feeling embarrassed. I'm embarrassed to now share the experience I had last night. I'm embarrassed that I can't seem to control my own mind/body. I'm embarrassed because I feel like this only happens to me and that there must be something wrong with me.

But that's the reason I need to share this post.

Because I'm NOT the only one.

Because so many people share this exact same experience and feel too ashamed or embarrassed to talk about it.

Because its NOT something to be embarrassed about.

I want everyone, YOU, to read this and know that you're not alone. There are so many people out there (seemingly "normal" people) who feel just like you. People who deal with panic attacks. People who deal with anxiety. People who deal with depression. You. Are. Not. Alone.

I think we've come a long way in terms of talking about and understanding mental health issues. But I also think we still have a long way to go.

We just need to keep talking, keep sharing our own experiences and let others know its okay.




March 25, 2019

Victoria Park | Truro, NS

Victoria Park is a park I have wanted to see for a very long time. I had heard pretty great things about it and decided I needed to see it for myself. So one day, we did just that.

March 21, 2019

Is It Too Late For 2019 Goal Making?




















On New Year's Eve when the clock struck twelve..
 I didn't resolve to do anything.
 I didn't set any goals.
 Maybe I didn't have any goals in mind? Maybe I just didn't feel like it?
Am I now too late to set some goals for myself?

Heck no.

March 18, 2019

Porter's Lake Provincial Park | West Porter's Lake, NS

While I may have had a year and a half long blog break we certainly didn't take a break from exploring and knocking off a few parks along the way. I really want to document any significant places we've been (like any Provincial Parks) here on the blog so they're all in one spot so I hope you guys don't mind if I play a little catch up with some posts? There aren't many- promise!

On a beautiful (somewhat gloomy) Fall morning we hopped in the car and stopped at Porter's Lake Provincial Park. If I'm remembering correctly, we were in the only ones around because I remember how peaceful it felt walking along the trail.

March 13, 2019

7 Dairy Free Breakfast Ideas For Toddlers

*toddler breakfast ideas......healthy toddler snacks......easy lunch ideas for toddlers*

If you're anything like me that's probably what your Google/Pinterest search history looks like.

And, if you're anything like me you probably walk away from your computer still wondering what the heck you're going to feed your kid because there's no way I'm attempting to make woodland creature themed breakfasts or 10 course lunches for my two year old- not uh, not gonna happen.

Throw in the added struggle of trying to come up with meal ideas that are dairy free and you're just about ready to throw in the towel and give your child cereal for every meal.

If this is you then have no fear friend- I've got you covered (at least for a week).

Today I'm sharing 7 easy, dairy free breakfast ideas for your toddler. 



March 09, 2019

Affordable DIY Staircase Makeover

Welcome to the first of MANY home renovation posts! (I know you're excited..)

This past Summer we became official first time home owners. Homeowners to a wonderful 103 year old house. Yes, you read that correctly. Our lovely little abode is a whopping one hundred and three. As you can imagine, she's in need of a little TLC and we're more than happy to give it to her.

When you have a home that needs a little a lot of work, it feels a bit overwhelming deciding where to start. Well, our staircase was ugly. Yep, plain old ugly. And since it's a commonly used area of the house we decided getting that sorted was high on the to-do list.

March 05, 2019

Welcome to Maritime Mama!





























Hello and Welcome! I am so excited to launch my new blog Maritime Mama! For those who may have wandered here from my old blog Life After Lux, hi again! For those who may be new- hi!